Living Legacies - Our Elders

Six hundred and fifty-six miles is the number of miles it takes to get to Philadelphia PA from Blackville SC.  It was a statement made by a pastor who this year preached at Thomasina Brown, affectionately know as (AKA) Aunt Tommie, daughter of Foster and Verdic Moseley-Brooker) funeral.  He said that “it’s a long way from Blackville, SC to Philadelphia, PA.”  That has stuck with me ever since.  Non-stop it takes 10 hours and 20 minutes by car, 61 hours by bike and 226 hours walking. 

This story is an account from my perspective of all that Aunt Tommie and her sisters, Doll, Lillian and Mildred, what they built and the determination along the way while migrating from Blackville SC to Philadelphia PA.  Thomasina Brooker-Brown (AKA Aunt Tommie), Willie Evangelist Brooker-Whitely (my mom and AKA Aunt Doll), Lillian Bernice Brooker-Mingo (AKA Aunt Lil) and Mildred Virtic Brooker-Whitehead (AKA as Aunt Mildred) were four girls out of 15 children.  There were two other girls, Aszrie Viola (age 9) and (unnamed), but they died at young ages.  Thomasina, Willie, Lillian and Mildred migrated to Philadelphia from the 1940’s – 1960’s.  Each taking their own path in getting there but ultimately landing in the same place.

Aunt Tommie married in her teens and her and husband moved to Philadelphia in 1942. She was the first to migrate to Philadelphia.  Aunt Lil left Blackville, moved to Florida stayed with her brother Foster “Bubba” Brooker where she met her husband. Due to military assignment with her husband, Aunt Lil’s family moved to Germany, then North Carolina and finally in 1969 settled in Philadelphia. My mom, Aunt Doll to most, was asked to come in 1948 by Aunt Tommie and Aunt Mildred was asked to come to Philadelphia by my mom Aunt Doll later in 1953.  These sisters were very close to each other and I could never understand why.  When I was growing up, they would talk to each other every day, morning, noon and night, non-stop.  It wasn’t just hello and goodbye conversations, they were hour long conversations.  In the 60’s and 70’s, cell phones did not exist so you were either in the bed talking or sitting in a chair talking with a phone connected to a long cord.  That’s for the young people under 25 reading this, yes phones had long cords and you had to stay where you were to use.

Not only did they talk for long periods of time, they also went everywhere with each other.  Church, shopping, traveling down south during the summers (best road trips ever), family gatherings, and traveling to go see their mother’s sister Dollis Henderson. The sisters made a deliberate effort of developing strong family bonds. Each Thanksgiving, we would rotate homes to have a planned Thanksgiving feast. Again, could never understand why their bond was so tight.  I interviewed Aunt Mildred, my mom and based on past conversations with Aunt Tommie and Aunt Lil, they would always say they had a hard life. These gatherings could have symbolized their overcoming of past and hope and prosperity for the future.

In the country when growing up, they had no want for food and a roof over their heads.  Papa (Foster Brooker) provided these things.  Also, their mother (Virtic (sometimes listed as “Verdic” Brooker) died at a young age so that might have also caused their strong bond.  Aunt Mildred said that the sisters always helped each other.  Their father had a farm and each of them from as young as they can remember, had to farm the land.  Papa had cotton, watermelons, peas, cantaloupes, some of everything.  They drew water from a well outside the house, cooked on a stove using wood for fire and kept food in a box using a block of ice to maintain the cold.  When they went to town, which was most Saturday’s they were given 5 cents or 25 cents.  My mom liked ice cream, which was about 10 cents.  Other candy favorites were Baby Ruth and PayDay candy bars.  Always wondered why she loved Baby Ruth candy, it’s a memory of her childhood.

My Aunt’s memories of their childhood were that you did what you were told to do, no questions asked.  What you did, what you ate, what you wore, etc… were all dictated by their parents.   Although life was hard at a young age, that gave each of them the grit and determination to provide a better life for their families.  That they did!  The sisters were able to obtain stable jobs, purchase comfortable homes, maintain and keep their families together.  It takes a lot to move from one place to another.  In the 1950’s Blackville’s population was 1,295 people and in Philadelphia it was 2.07 million people.  That’s a huge jump in potential neighbors.  Aunt Mildred traveled by train by herself at the age of 20 to Philadelphia and arrived Christmas day in 1953.  I asked her, weren’t you scared, she said “No”.  I asked my mom the same thing about her first-time traveling to Philadelphia by train, “weren’t you scared”, she said “no”.  Moving from the country to the city is truly taking a chance at life.  The first thing each of them did when they arrived, had dinner with family and started immediately looking for work.

To demonstrate determination, Aunt Mildred remembers one of her teachers, Ms Hoskins who was very interested in her students but very strict.  She said that “the Lord gave you five senses.  Figure out what you need to do to maintain yourself.  It’s up to you to see how far you can go and what you can make out of your life.”  Teachers do make a difference.

Aunt Mildred taught me determination.  I remember when growing up in Philadelphia we had terrible snow storms where everything would shut down, busses, businesses, schools, etc..  The snow did not stop Aunt Mildred, she would walk to work, approximately two miles, in 21 inches of snow because she knew people depended on her to get there.  She retired after 42 years.

Aunt Lil taught me how to be efficient and to not be afraid to travel by car.  My mom and Aunt Lil drove me to and from college.  As a college kid, you have so much stuff.  When looking at all of my dorm stuff, I would be bewildered on how to fit it all in the car.  Aunt Lil was a packing aficionado.  To this day, I still use her methods when packing my daughter up for college.  Her fearlessness on the road inspired me to not be afraid to travel.  She retired from work after 30 years and passed away in September 2015.

Aunt Tommie taught me things about maintaining a home.  She taught me how to bake, how to always find your pillow cases amongst your clean sheets and how to raise your children to get up in the morning without the mommy alarm (when you scream “get up and get ready!!” in the morning).  We would speak weekly and share stories about her love of God, motherhood and raising a family.  If you don’t want to have to wake your children up every day for school, start setting an alarm when they are as young as 4 years old.  Key point, the snooze button cannot be used and does not exist.  When the buzzer goes off, they should get up.  To this day, and my daughter is 20, I’ve never had to wake her up in the morning.  That’s a tip from Aunt Tommie.  She retired from work after 30 years and passed away April 2019.

Last but not least, I learned from my mom, Aunt Doll how to bring people together for a festive time and to care for others.  My mom has a knack for bringing people together with food and conversation.  She also has a heart for people and their needs.  An ability to talk with strangers and be able to pull out of them their life stories.  Sometime ago she told me that she would visit a friend at a senior center and just talk with her and brush her hair.  I’m sure the women who she did this for was very appreciative.  Her generosity and open communication teach me every day that we all are in need but with just a little caring can make the world a better place.  She retired from work after 30 years.

Today, I look back at all of the memories and try to glean what I learned.  My Aunts are strong, independent women, who had a determination to lift themselves out of their circumstances and give their families the best they have.  Whether it was their stylish and simple elegant looks, their fearlessness in exploring a large city in the northeast, international travels, their cooking extraordinaire, how they saved and handled money or just how they loved their family with fun and togetherness, these women were and are incredible.  I am who I am because of them. It’s a long way from Blackville, SC to Philadelphia but the Brooker women beat the odds.  They made home’s, lived long, decent lives and gave their families the best God gives to us, their Love.